The actual irony of leaked documents about the Supreme Court on the Roe v Wade ruling on abortion the week ahead of Mothers Day is not lost on me. So much anger and animosity surrounds this issue and social media has been bombarded with everyone’s opinions , this issue was already polarizing and we hardly need any more division and anger. I wonder if you have ever experienced an argument in which you said to your opponent “Oh, now that you scream louder and become more aggressive, I see the point you are trying to make.” I am going to go out on a limb and say that that never has, and never will happen to you or anyone else. So, ahead of Mother’s Day, I have decided to share my own experience and hope that it affects someone in a positive way.

When I was 19, I learned that I was pregnant. Certainly, it wasn’t anything I had planned. I had only been seeing the father for three months and the situation was less than ideal for someone who was young, just graduated high school and from a family who was unable to help much economically. At first, I was very scared and everyone having varying opinions about what I should and shouldn’t do was not helping me. In fact it was making me more stressed. In honesty, I didn’t want anyone’s opinion, what I wanted was a minute to collect myself, gather my courage and move forward. Abortion wasn’t anything I had seriously considered and I knew that irresponsible actions had consequences. I decided that my child was a gift from God and that since God would never leave me nor forsake me. I moved forward in faith even though I had no clue what I was doing. You know what, He never did leave me, and He never did forsake me, and even though I wasn’t the perfect mother and sometimes the road was harder than I would have liked my reward is a mature, responsible and handsome young man that loves his Mumzie.  I couldn’t have asked for a more blessed life, things have turned out better than I ever would have expected. How was I to know at the time that this would have been my only chance to experience pregnancy and childbirth? I didn’t and as it turns out Mothers Day would look a lot different for me had I not have made a different choice. I would hate to have gotten to this point in my life to look back and say that I regretted the decision I had made, God had not provided another opportunity to me for a biological child.

This can be a stressful time for some, and instead of offering compassion and understanding I do see some Christians with one hand holding a Bible that says there is not condemnation in Christ Jesus and their lips shouting about “you murderer!” I would challenge this kind of ideology a little bit and give you some push back. As a strategy, I don’t believe shaming ever works. Just as Jesus came to this earth as an example, we need to be that example now that He is seated at the right hand of God. As Christians YOU know Jesus as your Lord and Savior, YOU know that even when times are tough He will never leave you nor forsake you, YOU know that God is no respecter of persons and what He would do for one He would do for all, YOU know that God is merciful, but do YOU know He expects you to extend to others the same mercy? Odds are that a lot of these ladies have not yet been introduced to Jesus. Is yelling and screaming representing Jesus in a positive way? Maybe instead you could try to introduce this conflicted person to a compassionate, loving and faithful Jesus through a story similar to mine. Maybe, you can show them that He is no respecter of persons and what He did for me He would do for them. I wonder if that would change some scared and conflicted minds and give them some confidence and hope for a solid future for them and their baby?

Bad things happen every day, this world isn’t perfect and please don’t take this as me saying that there is never a situation where the compassionate and merciful thing to do is terminate the pregnancy. I believe that this should be dealt with in the light not the shadows. It is best that women can get these surgical procedures done by licensed professionals. In some of these circumstances I can’t say I would not make the same decision. What I guess I am trying to say, that in a circumstance like mine, where I was capable but scared, a witness of God’s goodness would probably go farther than judgement and condemnation. It may just change someone’s mind.

To all the mothers out there…, Happy Mother’s Day! And to anyone struggling with a decision like this, if I can do it, you can too. The best things in life are a little scary, but ultimately so rewarding.